I said to Myself…

I said to myself- this simple phrase we hear in everyday conversation holds a clue to how we interpret events and react to situations.  

Most of us realize that we are constantly carrying on our own private inner dialogue. But if you really think about the words “I said to Myself” you understand that there are actually 2 of you in that conversation - the “I” that is talking and the “Myself” that is listening.

And once you gain awareness of these inner conversations, you can begin to really listen to them. 

You might learn that your inner conversations include a lot of time worrying about the future or regretting the past or hoping for something to happen or not happen. Perhaps you are constantly judging and assessing- labeling situations good or bad. 

If you are like most of us, your inner dialogues are often adding some sort of unhappy narrative to the what ever situation you are dealing with. 

Whatever comes up, just allow yourself to listen to the stories you are telling yourself. 

Then your life becomes your laboratory. 

For example, The next time you have a minor disturbance in your life- such as waiting in line at the grocery store- conduct your own experiment: Ask yourself  “what am I telling myself about this situation?” Are you frustrated at the person in front of you? Angry at yourself for coming to the store at a busy time? Thinking of how the checker could move faster?  

Then ask yourself how you would experience this event if you didn’t add you own narrative to the situation. What if you could let go of the judgmental thoughts and just be present?  

Once you learn to really listen to the conversations you are having with yourself, you will discover a great deal of your unhappiness is not the event but your identification with the story you are telling yourself about the event. 

Could you tell yourself a new story? After all you are the one telling it to yourself. 

Freedom comes when you realize that you are the one thinking these thoughts and you get to decide what story you want to tell the next time you say “I said to Myself”.